Thursday, March 8, 2012

Thank you, Jesus.


Matthew 6:31-33
"So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?'" (or my current worry, where will we move?) These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs.

Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.


Sigh...

I never realized how much I hate waiting.  Restated:  I never realized how similar I am in this way to my 5-year-old.  I like feedback.  I like step-by-step progress reports.  I like met deadlines.  I thrive in schedules and plans.  Perhaps this is why God gave me Nola, and for that matter Kevin.  They are so not the same as me.  Maybe I'm supposed to learn to be more flexible.  I don't think God is asking me to totally change who I am, but I think He wants me to be less fixated on schedules and expectations.  

So while we're in this period of waiting for word that we did or didn't get a house that would meet all of our present and foreseeable needs, God wants me to relax.  To spend my time doing all the little things that will prepare me one way or another for moving to that house or another one. 

I've felt in my spirit ever since the first time that I saw a picture of the house that it was the one for us.  There was a little delay between that and actually making contact with anyone about it.  And once I drove by it and then eventually walked through it and realized that it was even better for us than I thought, I completely feel like it's ours.   Believe me when I say that I have more to go on than just feelings.  I have words and pictures and prayers from myself and other people guiding and confirming my thoughts.  I hear God speaking to me more at this time in my life than any other.  It's just the waiting that is driving me crazy.  It's crazy that I'm feeling God move in all sorts of ways, but here I am asking him to move faster?!  

But this scripture, as well as many others, has spoken to me.  So yes, I'll continue to wait.  What other choice do I have, right?  I can't promise that I'll always be patient and composed.  I definitely will lose it sometimes.  But I will learn through this that any schedule, expectation, or plan that I have cannot even begin to compare to any schedule, expectation or plan that God has for me and my family.

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